Josephine (Host)

Hi everyone, welcome to the Love to Live Healthy show. I’m Josephine Fitzpatrick. Today we have a very special guest, Stephanie Luft from Merrick. I’m going to bring Stephanie in now. Hi, stephanie, hi, how are you? How are you Good? So thank you for joining us. I’m so excited. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Oh, my pleasure, take it easy. 

Josephine (Host)

So you are definitely like one of my long time clients, right? 

Stephanie (Guest)

I think I’ve been following your program over eight years. Yes, eight and a half years now.

Josephine (Host)

That’s amazing. That’s so exciting. I love that. So, how much did you lose? 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes, so originally I lost about 11. That was my original goal weight was to lose 11. Total, I’m probably down about 17 or 18.  

Josephine (Host)

That’s amazing, yeah. So your total is 18, but your original goal was 11. But what’s funny is, once you got to this new number, now that’s your number. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yeah, and now I think about that number. Like what do you mean I was seven pounds more at one point. How could I have been 7 lbs more than this number.

Josephine (Host)

It’s so funny how that happens. 

Now, what’s different? I think, too. And what I love about your story and I wanted to share is you go through times because it has been, you know, almost nine years where you have little instances of maybe like something going on in your life or whatever, and you go up a couple of pounds and you come in, and immediately, as soon as you come back in and you’ve done it so many times you lose it in like the first or second week.

Stephanie (Guest)

So it’s funny because I came into the office like two months ago and you put me right back on track. I lost it in two weeks. 

So I went through some medical things so I couldn’t really work out the way I wanted to, and also accepting age too. I mean, I started this journey nine years ago, so there’s a big difference between being in your early 40s and being in your early 50s, Right, like the change of your body and everything else that’s happening along with your diet and your exercise, but also your hormones right. 

Josephine (Host)

Yes, exactly, a big difference.

So what everyone doesn’t know. Stephanie makes me laugh all the time. Every time she’s in the office. Since I’ve known her, she’s just hysterical. So when she doesn’t feel good about her body, she will not walk into the bathroom, she backs into the bathroom. 

Stephanie (Guest)

So my husband can see the better parts of me. It’s so funny because you know my whole life I was always hung up on like having a big, you know, big ass, like when I gain weight that’s where it goes, but like I needed to be born after the Kardashian error, and the JLO error. So when we were younger, you know that was always the thing. Right.

(Both Laughing)

Josephine (Host)

Yes. Right. So Funny.

And just so you know this is her talking, because if you saw her, you would be like, oh my God, that’s what I dreamed to look like. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Thank you, thank you, but everybody has their hand up. 

Josephine (Host)

Everyone has them

Stephanie (Guest)

And when I started working with you and my goal weight was like six pounds more than I am now, it was like I could never imagine the number that I’m at right now. That was like I don’t even think I was this number in high school. 

But you know, everybody puts pressure on themselves and like we talk about, I think there’s a pressure where we live. 

Josephine (Host)

Yeah, right, Of course yeah, and that’s a big thing. But the other sense too is sometimes if you don’t have that little bit of obsession it can so easily get out of hand. 

Stephanie (Guest)

It did and you totally brought me back. So I felt so much better because I left and it was like shocking to me and you just said to me just you know, change one snack and it immediately worked. And it really did make all the difference.

Josephine (Host)

It’s always the little details that make the most difference. 

Stephanie (Guest)

You know you and I have discussed this before. How many times at work I’ve been skinny shamed at work, I think. I think more at work than outside of work. I had one person actually and we spoke about this too was she at one point like, shook my pants and she’s like Are you okay, are you sick? These are so big on you. And I was like, first of all, didn’t ask you and, second of all, what was that about? But I think a lot of it is just, you know, through jealousy.

Josephine (Host)

Yeah yeah, and I do think the worst comes out when someone’s jealous. And listen. We always have to remember weight loss is one of the hardest things to do. We’re surrounded by temptation all the time and when you see someone jealous of course because it’s so hard to lose weight. I think like to your point before when you said when your coworker said that to you I think it just sometimes, when you’re in such a good place and you look so good, it can make other people very uncomfortable.

Stephanie (Guest)

Yeah. You are right I didn’t think about it like that.

Josephine (Host)

Yeah, that’s when you force people to look at themselves and a lot of times when someone’s not in a good place, they don’t, don’t want to do that you know,. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yeah. But you’re right, there’s so much temptation. So every time I’m at a meeting at work, there’s the one who I said to you. She comes with a huge, huge bowl of candy and sticks it like right in the middle of the table. And usually I’m in the middle and the other day I took like a paper towel and I stuck it on top and put something else on top so I didn’t have to see it. And they’re like what are you doing? I’m like I can’t sit here and stare at peppermint patties when they’re like my favorite. 

And that same group would sometimes just if there was a party and they’re having cake like just because it’s your birthday doesn’t mean I have to eat cake on a Tuesday, right? And they’re like you’re not gonna have a bite. I’m like I’m good and they are like but you could afford it. You’re so skinny. 

Josephine (Host)

That is why you look the way you do, because you’re not doing the cake on a Tuesday just because it’s there. 

But you know, I love that. I think it’s so important for people to hear, like, what other people go through when they’re when they’re trying to lose weight, because while you handle it so well, I have clients who really get so upset they cry. You know, I had one client recently who cried at the table because her friend supposedly was skinny shaming her at the dinner. And you know it’s hurtful because you’re trying so hard to lose weight and when you get to a good place, instead of people going well, you look great. And understanding that’s why you look great and all the positive things that you’d want to hear from your friends, and instead it’s reverse, or the opposite, and it can really be hurtful. So it’s good. I love the way you handle it. I think that’s so great. 

So tell me one thing as far as like how you feel, especially because you’ve been on for so long. Give me an idea of like what you do when you go on vacation. Like how do you handle that? Because these are questions clients ask me all the time. So, of course, when I tell them, it’s one thing, but when they hear from you or a client, it’s a big difference. 

Stephanie (Guest)

So it’s funny because some people say, oh, you’re on vacation, but I’m like, okay, I need to. There’s so many things like swirling around in my head. So it’s funny because sometimes we go on vacation or sometimes you know, we have our vacation place and it’s like being at home and for some reason, I don’t know it’s harder for me sometimes now to be there than if we just were on vacation and going to restaurants all the time. I do think to myself like, yes, I’m on vacation, but I know that at the end, if I’m gaining four pounds, three pounds, two pounds, it’s not making me happy. Like recently when we were away, I tried to do the best I could and we were, you know, in our apartment and I was really sticking to it, 

Josephine (Host)

Which it’s funny because if you gain a pound or two, you know you’re going to lose it. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes, but I don’t want to go through the pain of like agonizing over it,. Like the other day when we were away, we were in our apartment and you know my husband, he’ll weigh himself to most days and I was like tempted to get on the scale. So I get on the scale and and he’s asking me questions and I’m not responding. I said do me a favor, just don’t even talk to me. I’m not in a good mood and I’m not answering anything. This is just a warning for you. 

Josephine (Host)

(Laughing) Oh it’s always good to give warnings. 

Stephanie (Guest)

I was like don’t talk to me, because I got on the scale and I was pissed off. (Laughing), yes so I gave him the warning.

Josephine (Host)

Do you think it’s harder now for you to get back as quick. 

Stephanie (Guest)

I think so, but I think I’m also mentally struggling, like I said, with the change of body because of the medical reasons why I couldn’t work out the way I wanted to. You know it’s just cardio. And I know that I’m thin because of the sizes that I wear because of what the scale says. 

Josephine (Host)

Cardio is very good for you mentally. It really does help you. It’s like a different level, a different feeling. So even if your weight stayed the same, I don’t think you would necessarily feel the same without it, because your body is so used to doing it. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes, you are right and that makes me feel better. But like it’s so funny. So this is, it’s like it’s either. You know, we used to say I either have a full face and a big ass or small face and a small ass, because I lose my weight from there. Now the conundrum, as I’m sitting in the sun and I don’t want to get it on my face, so I sit up and then I look at my stomach and I have these like lines from where the rolls are tanning, that everybody really has. And now it’s either I have a pale face and I have these lines in my stomach, or I’m going to have like a good tan stomach the way it should be, and my face looking like leather.  So, we just catch a break here when you’re losing weight and trying to get to where you want to be (laughing)

Josephine (Host)

(Laughing). So true, But also, I think the biggest thing is, what we’re talking about, too, is age, because how much more do we worry about getting a tan now than we did when we were younger? 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes, right exactly. Now when I sit in the sun I’m on to the umbrella and I don’t care, because then it’s like all right. Well, you know, I’m trying to use every product to get rid of the sunspots. 

Josephine (Host)

Yes, right and as soon as you go out in the sun they all come back. I agree. As we get older, it’s just such a different mindset, because we used to be like, I can remember pictures of you in your bathing suit on the boat. But now it’s like you don’t even want to go in the sun.

Stephanie (Guest)

(Laughing) But that picture was like the ideal day I said to my husband and to my sister and to my kids see this picture. This is a picture you’re going to use it if I ever go missing. This is what’s going to be on all over channel seven. She is missing and she looks like this. (Laughing)

Josephine (Host)

(Laughing) That is hysterical, you are so funny. But I think that was actually before you got to your thinnest. 

Stephanie (Guest)

It’s probably before I was at this weight, Yeah.

Josephine (Host)

That was before you lost the last 6 pounds, and look at how you loved, how you looked. Now look at what you just said. And now you’re six pounds lighter. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yeah. You are right. 

Stephanie (Guest)

I never old you this so other people would say you know, who is Josephine. Because sometimes Danny will reference, you know, like if the kids are over, oh, Josephine says don’t eat that. And they are like who is Josephine, And Danny says, it’s the little person that sits on her shoulder during meals, and pipes things into her ear (laughing)

Josephine (Host)

(Laughing) Oh my God, that is so funny. I love that.  So this is at your lowest weight. 

Stephanie (Guest)

I’m sure you’re going to want me to say this, okay, so I have my low number that I aim for, and then, for whatever reason, I got like two pounds lower than that and it scared me, my body scared me, like I’m seeing bones and I’m like I cannot look like that. So you know, when they say you can’t be too rich or too thin, like for me, like I was.

Josephine (Host)

Yes, I remember when that happened. And there is a fine line you have to be careful at. And that’s why I said before, you know which I don’t even think you’ve ever realized like when you were talking about, like your picture on the boat, like you said, that was the best you felt at the time, like you’d never look better. Meanwhile you ended up losing six pounds more. Now, after that, I know what you mean. Like when you go to that fine line of another two pounds more, it can really change how you look in a bad way, you know. You just start losing everything you know, and that’s not good either. But that’s when you know, like you look at yourself and you say, okay, wait. Because I do know unfortunately Women tend too, and men, I’m sure do too, but they tend to go on what other people say. So sometimes you’ll get someone who’ll say, oh, don’t lose any more weight, you look too thin and you really don’t. But I know I have clients who, if people don’t say to them you look too thin, they don’t feel thin, they’re like why isn’t anybody saying it to me? I hear that all the time from them because it kind of reaffirms that they feel like they’re in a good place. But it doesn’t always mean that, because sometimes people are like you’re too thin and you really might be. I’ve said it to clients you can’t lose any more weight and sometimes, like you said, it’s not even on purpose. Your body’s in that weight loss mode and I know people are listening going I wish I had that. Your body has been losing weight for a while so it just keep losing. But it doesn’t last, it will stop and eventually it’ll balance out. And then all of a sudden you find yourself like oh, I just I want to be that one number again. But it’s very hard to be that one number and that’s why I always say you need those two or three pounds that give you flexibility in your weight it can never be just one number. 

I wanted to say too, which I love you with your cheat day. Now, a lot of times I have actually in the last, I guess, couple of years, two years I’ve been putting people on cheat meal because they just cannot handle a cheat day, and a lot of times it is because they’re not being 100% during the week, which you know, when you have that cheat day, you have to be 100% during the week. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes totally. 

Josephine (Host)

But your stories with your cheat day are just by far the best. 

Stephanie (Guest)

I’ll tell you one because I don’t think I’ve ever shared this with you. So you know, typically my cheat days are on a Saturday and typically when you get together with friends it’s on a Saturday. So you know, I save it for dinner and during the summer we’ll be with friends at the beach or we go to their house or a pool. We have a couple that we’re very good friends with, and when they first met me and I would do my cheat day, I think that he was shocked, right. So he makes a barbecue and while I’m eating the ribs with all the guys, all the other women are eating these dainty salads, and he’s like Stephanie, eats like a gavone. 

So they tell that daughter that. And she’s like you said that to her. He is like, yeah, I shouldn’t have. She’s like no woman wants to hear that they eat like a gavone. (Laughing).  And I’m like, I’m good with it, I’m proud of it, because you know I can wear a bikini and eat like that on a Saturday (both laughing)

But yeah, then Sunday morning comes and I get right back, because mentally, Sunday just resets me, right, it’s just right back and then I’m good. Yeah, I just, I really can discipline and get right back, on Sunday.

Josephine (Host)

Yes that is so important. I really keep trying to tell people that is like one of the best things you can learn from this program, for example, the way you just said it, like you almost embrace getting back on every Sunday, like you can’t wait. I love that.

The best part of this whole thing is you’ve been on so long and you really live the program. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Yes, I really do.

Josephine (Host)

You really do and I love that. I am So thankful that you shared your story, I’m telling you that you don’t even realize how much these help everyone. Every time I do a podcast, people come in. They’re like I love that. I learned so much. Just learning how to deal with people, and the strategies you use helps so much. Especially since you had such a rough year with medical issues.

Stephanie (Guest)

Yeah, and you know, just because I’m talking to you now doesn’t mean that even during the outside of this rough year, that I haven’t bounced up a few pounds at certain times and bounce back down.

Josephine (Host)

(Laughing) Yes, I know that is when you come back in and I get to see you.

Stephanie (Guest)

(Laughing). I love you and I so appreciate you having me. 

Josephine (Host)

Thank you so much. I love you. I appreciate you. Have the best weekend. 

Stephanie (Guest)

Thank you so much. 

Josephine (Host)

Thank you so much, stephanie. That was an amazing story. We appreciate you. We appreciate your time and we appreciate so much of sharing your journey with us, how you’ve dealt with going up and down in the last nine years and how you deal with all the outside circumstances that go on in almost everyone’s life. So thank you.

And we want to thank everyone who’s listening today and has been sharing the love to live healthy podcast. We appreciate it. We appreciate the likes, we appreciate the comments. Please, any questions you have, leave down below. We’re here for you. We want you to live healthy and love living your best life. Much hugs and loves from me to all of you. Have a great one everyone. 

~Love to Live Healthy With Josephine Fitzpatrick